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Saturday, December 8, 2012

Pope Ghost Rides a New Whip


The new Holy Roller, Pope Benedict XVI's newest ML-based armored "Popemobile".

Pope Benedict XOXOEpisodeVTheEmpireStrikesBack XVI just received his brand spankin' new Benzo in the form of the familiar Popemobile. Recent Popes (Popi?) have traditionally made public appearances from within the armored confines of either a Mercedes-Benz ML or G-class specially outfitted for the purpose of securely displaying the guy with the big hat to his humbled masses, and also the occasional guy who tries to murder him.

Mercedes-Benz CEO Dieter Zetsche tossing his Holiness the keys. "First gear sticks a little until she's warmed up."

The new vehicle relies heavily on the tried and true formula of an all white body and interior with vast expanses of bullet-resistant glass (transparent armor in industry lingo) and a specially prepared seat that can raise the Pope higher up to become more visible. Considering that the current Holy See is 85-years old we can also imagine there are special controls to alert the driver that "it's too cold back here" or "you're driving way too fast!" in the spirit of a frisky Mrs. Daisy from the popular film.


If his own closest advisers are to be believed, this new vehicle arrived just in the nick of time.

J-Paul the Deuce rolling in his Ferrari Mondial. Oh how we pine for simpler days!

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